


Free Trial

by ObsessedtwibrarianOTB



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/M, Flash Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-30 09:10:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6417571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObsessedtwibrarianOTB/pseuds/ObsessedtwibrarianOTB
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When something's free, there's always a catch.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Free Trial

“You get a two week free trial,” she said. “It says so right here: ‘Use our product for fourteen days…FREE! Experience our wide range of services for yourself! No credit card required.’”

She could point her finger at that glossy brochure all she wanted, but there was no way she was going to convince me. My mama didn’t raise no fool. “Bullshit,” I stated. “Nothing’s free. They’re gonna slide some hidden fee in there, or start charging my bank account every month and I’ll have to hire a hit man to make them stop. There’s a catch somewhere, honey, you can bet on that. Besides, there’s no way in hell this is legit.”

“XY Leasing _is_ a legitimate company,” she insisted. “I researched them. They have a business license and a real office downtown. Come on, honey. Let’s live a little. There’s nothing to lose. It’s FREE!”

My best friend was notoriously persistent. She wasn’t going to give up. Snarling in frustration, I grabbed the brochure and made the call.

\---------------------------------------------------

 

My free trial arrived on my doorstep the next morning and damn if he wasn’t one of the finest combinations of XY chromosomes I’d ever seen. _Now to test this ‘free trial’ shit and see if this “product” will actually do everything I ask him to do._

I decided to start him out easy. Before I left for work, I told him to clean both bathrooms top to bottom, pick up any stray clothing and put it in the laundry basket, then have dinner ready by 5:30 sharp. He smiled, nodded, and assured me all would be done as I asked. I was momentarily taken aback by his quick acquiescence. My ex would have whined for a full thirty tortuous minutes before finally flat-out refusing to do it. I was impressed, but skeptical.

However, when I arrived home after a hard day at work, the bathrooms were sparkling, not a stray sock or panty could be found anywhere throughout the house, and a full-course meal was laid out on the table… _with candles!_ Shit. Maybe I was too hasty with my skepticism. Maybe this product really did what it was advertised to do!

Over dinner, we discussed politics and religion. He disagreed with me on some points, but he never once told me I was wrong or stupid. He even complimented my intelligence and also my ability to engage in spirited adult conversation with civility. What the ever-loving fuck?? I was beginning to think this company was for REALS!

Day two I upped the ante: laundry and lawn maintenance. I told him I wanted every single piece of dirty clothing washed, folded and put away in its proper place. After that he was to mow the lawn, trim with the weed-eater, and sweep the grass off the sidewalks and the driveway. He smiled, nodded, and assured me it would be done. When I returned home that evening, it was.

Wow. I was _really_ impressed now. I decided it was time to see just how far this free trial would go. After all, the brochure had stated I could experience a ‘wide range of services’, so...

“Are you married?”

He shook his head. “No.”

“Dating anyone?”

He smiled, and again shook his head.

I bit my lip. “So, if I asked you to take me into the bedroom and….”

He sighed. “I really would love to—you’re an extremely beautiful woman— but that service is not included in the free trial. You’d have to sign up for the Gold Package.”

Yep. I told her there would be a catch.

 


End file.
